Saying Goodbye to Dreams and Hopes

We've been 'radio silent' for a while, because since Doug returned from Brazil, many things have been up in the air. 

I am extremely sad and disappointed to report that we will no longer be going to Brazil.  After reviewing the information Doug gathered in Brazil, the company decided not to move forward with the Brazil project. It's a bit of a 'double whammy' for me, because not only are we not going to live overseas, learning a new culture, language and serving the people there; our house in Livermore is rented out until August and we are in Illinois, where I have not wanted to be.  I don't think that is news to anyone :).  So, now what?  

Well, even though men have made these decisions, God is utlimately in control and making these decisions through men.  For some reason, he wants us to be here right now.  We will trust HIm and be open to what He will teach us through this.  Per the wise words from Kevin Sauder to us - we will not waste this trial.  The company has given Doug another position here in Illinois that he has already started.  So, will we settle long-term in Illinois?  We don't know. The last 6 months have been quite full and stressful, so we will stay put for a while, let the dust settle, enjoy the holidays and just 'live' for a while.  We'll see what the future holds.

These have not been easy lessons, but I know we will look back someday and be thankful for what we've learned.  We're learning to have joy in all circumstances and to trust God in all circumstances, to communicate with each other better, to desire God and Godly things more than worldly things and so much more.  Unfortunately, we grow the most when things are hard.  I wonder if that is why grapevines/vineyards are referred to so often in the Bible -- their fruit  grows best when growing conditions are harder. 

We rest in these promises --

"The LORD is my portion," says my soul, "therefore I will hope in him." The LORD is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him. It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD. It is good for a man that he bear the yoke in his youth. Let him sit alone in silence when it is laid on him; let him put his mouth in the dust--there may yet be hope; let him give his cheek to the one who strikes, and let him be filled with insults. For the LORD will not cast off forever, but, though he cause grief, he will have compassion according to the abundance of his steadfast love; for he does not willingly afflict or grieve the children of men." -- Lamentations 3:24-32

"Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go." – Joshua 1:8-9

"Be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; 
never will I forsake you."  So we say with confidence,  "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.  What can man do to me?" -- Hebrews 13:5,6

         
"At this, Job got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. Then he fell to the ground in worship and said: 
       "Naked I came from my mother's womb,
       and naked I will depart.
       The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away;
       may the name of the LORD be praised."  -- Job 1:20 - 21

This is one of my favorite hymns that I pray will always be my heart.  It was written by Horatio Spafford after several traumatic events in his life. The first was the death of his only son in 1871 at the age of four, shortly followed by the great Chicago Fire which ruined him financially (he had been a successful lawyer). Then in 1873, all four of his daughters died when the ship they were on sank rapidly after a collision with a sailing ship.  --

jars of clay - it is well with my soul mp3

It is Well with My Soul
When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;

Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say,

It is well, it is well with my soul.

(Refrain:) It is well (it is well),

with my soul (with my soul),

It is well, it is well with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,

Let this blest assurance control,

That Christ hath regarded my helpless estate,

And hath shed His own blood for my soul.

(Refrain)

My sin, oh the bliss of this glorious thought!

My sin, not in part but the whole,

Is nailed to His cross, and I bear it no more,

Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

(Refrain)

For me, be it Christ, be it Christ hence to live:

If Jordan above me shall roll,

No pain shall be mine, for in death as in life

Thou wilt whisper Thy peace to my soul.

(Refrain)

And Lord haste the day, when my faith shall be sight,

The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;

The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,

Even so, it is well with my soul.

(Refrain)

And, this one has been very poignant in my life lately, too! -- 

Download this mp3 from Beemp3.com

All I Have is Christ

I once was lost in darkest night
Yet thought I knew the way
The sin that promised joy and life
Had led me to the grave
I had no hope that You would own
A rebel to Your will
And if You had not loved me first
I would refuse You still

But as I ran my hell-bound race
Indifferent to the cost
You looked upon my helpless state
And led me to the cross
And I beheld God's love displayed
You suffered in my place
You bore the wrath reserved for me
Now all I know is grace

Hallelujah! All I have is Christ
Hallelujah! Jesus is my life

Now, Lord, I would be Yours alone
And live so all might see
The strength to follow Your commands
Could never come from me
Oh Father, use my ransomed life
In any way You choose
And let my song forever be
My only boast is You

© 2009 Sovereign Grace Praise (BMI)